Well tonight was my first weigh-in at Weight Watchers and it definitely did NOT go the way I expected it to go. I am so incredibly frustrated, disappointed, angry and depressed. I followed the WW program completely this week. I stayed within my points EVERYDAY! I only used half of the additional weekly points allowance I had. I exercised 3 days for at least 30 min. I drank TONS of water. AND I STILL GAINED WEIGHT!!!! WTF??....Is ALL I have to say.
I got off the scale and looked in my book and was COMPLETELY dumbfounded to see a .2 gain written in there. I KNOW .2 is NOT a lot, but I fully expected a LOSS. I sat down and had to work REALLY hard to hold back the tears. Then I wanted to run out the door and go home. The only reason I did not is because my friend Loretta was there with me. She had nothing but encouraging things to say, but I still played the words over and over in my head...."I am a failure!" Then awards are given out and someone lost 11 lbs in 2 weeks....I wanted that to be me! Actually that WAS me when I did WW in 2006. I just do not know what I did wrong??? The leader said, "If you follow your points you WILL lose weight!" So again I am left with my thought of WTF??
A big part of me wants to quit.I left the meeting and immediately went on a binge. I went to a drive-thru and ate crap. BUT after I ate it I went into my points tracker and logged it ALL in. So I guess deep down I do NOT want to quit. I just NEED SOME success. I need something to say good job working the program here is a 1 or 2 lb loss for you. Is that SO much to ask?? I mean how is it that I do EVERYTHING the program says and I STILL gain?? I am NOT lying AT ALL!! I was ON PROGRAM ALL WEEK. I do not know what happened.
Hopefully tomorrow I will wake up ready to go and work the program again?!?! Right now I am not 100% sure that will happen!
WHY does this have to be SO difficult?!?!
Take a deep breath, God's mercies are new every morning, and He loves you. He created you, inside and out. He knows you perfectly, and as far as He is concerned, you are perfect. You are HIS. Center on this. You can do this. Keep at it. It will pay off.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry... it sucks when things don't go as you think they will. Sometimes you can do everything right and life still doesn't turn out as you think it should.
ReplyDeleteYou have two options... give up or try again.
It's your choice.
You want to be healthy, so you can't go by your feelings of disappointment right now, you have to go by your desire to be healthy... one step at a time, you can do it!
I met Dawn last year at a conference... she's a wonderful person and maybe reading about her journey will give you strength to go on.. http://bbubblyb.blogspot.com