Thursday, March 8, 2012

Two Challenging Weekends in a Row

    On February 24 Dad was discharged from the hospital. It was a few days prior that we had to tell him he was not coming straight home upon discharge. Dad was weak before he was hospitalized and adding 10 days in the hospital, mostly bedridden, rendered him incredibly weak. Dad was unable to walk alone, even using a walker. He needed a short-term residential rehab. facility. The 24th was the day he was going there.

     The 24th was also the day my husband and I were leaving to go away for the weekend. It was a crazy day, but all in all we got Dad settled in and then headed out for out trip to Hershey, PA. "A Weekend to Remember", a christian marriage conference was our destination. I was really looking forward to a weekend with John to focus on our relationship. I was NOT looking forward to the daunting job of making good food chioces for 2 1/2 days. Meals were not included in this conference so we were on our own, in HERSHEY, PA, the land of CHOCOLATE!!!!!  Sigh!!

    I did my best to plan ahead. I went to the store Thursday and bought items we could keep in our room to have for breakfast both mornings as well as snacks. For lunch a group of us went to Friendy's together. If you look at my earlier post (Stress and Food Choices) about Friendly's you will see how I USED to eat there! Today I remained in control and ordered the half sandwich and salad, using only vinegar on the salad, and drank water. I was doing well.

   Dinner was a special date night for John and I. We made reservations at a restaurant in the Hershey Lodge. I had also planned ahead for this meal. I looked at the menu online and I knew what I wanted to eat even before we got there! I also saved ALL of my extra weekly points, that I typically do not use, and planned to use them! All of this planning ahead is SO very new to me. I thought it would make me feel trapped and limited, but instead it has empowered me!!  The warm dinner rolls arrived on the table which is my downfall to begin with, BUT because we were in Hershey there was a twist, CHOCOLATE BUTTER was served with the WARM dinner rolls. I was done for then and there! I allowed myself to over-endulge for that meal. I did not count up the points I had used, I mearly took EVERY SINGLE point I had left and wrote "dinner" next to it.

       Historically a splurge like that dinner would have me so wracked with guilt that I would play the same record in my head: " I might as well quit since I messed up tonight", "There is no way I can get back on track after eating like this." "See I knew I did not have self control."   But I pushed those thoughts AWAY as they attempted to sidetrack me. Instead I began to tell myself, "It is ok. It was ONE night. Get back on program tomorrow." That is EXACTLY what I did. I did not allow one night of over-endulgence the power of taking away the success of the previous 6+ weeks. Another HUGE hurdle I made it over.....I know that SAME hurdle will present itself in the future, but getting over it the first time is the hardest. Each time after that the previous success lifts you up and over that hurdle a little easier!!

       I did not attend my WW meeting the following Monday for several reasons. I had a very stressful day dealing with stuff at the rehab. where my Dad is now staying, John was working, I was beginning to get sick, I had PMS and KNEW I was retaining water. Ultimately I knew the scale would be up so I bailed on the meeting. This was not a good choice, but again one I did not allow to change my overall direction. Monday I was back on program and had a great week. It is a good thing I had a great week because we had yet ANOTHER weekend away to face!!
      This time it was a family retreat with our church family. The families take turns making the meals and the menu is put out before we go so I could plan ahead again. Wow, that makes ALL the difference in the world!!  Sat. breakfast I was good, Sat lunch was make your own hoagies so I brought my own bread that was FAR LESS points than a hoagie roll!! Dinner was tacos so I had little meat, cheese and sour cream and instead loaded up on the veggies!! My biggest saving grace was having salad available with EVERY meal!!  I had even saved enough points to allow myself to partake in ice cream sundae night!  I had a small scoop of ice cream and a small piece of brownie. Somehow I WAS satisfied with that. Historically I would have a ton of ice cream and lots of brownies!!

     Sunday lunch was the final meal of the weekend and my group made it. It was homemade chicken parmesan with spaghetti. I could LIVE on pasta, but it is high in points. I had my chicken, my spaghetti and my bread while staying within my points because THAT was my big meal of the day. Again I am NOT DEPRIVING myself, I am just making BETTER CHOICES!!!   I KNOW this will NEVER be an EASY life change. I know I am able to succeed. I know I will fall short sometimes. The key is to realize TOMORROW IS A NEW DAY!! A FRESH START!!

    Looking forward........that is what I must keep doing......looking forward!!!

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